BAJ
When you were a kid, did you ever stay up past your bedtime? Eat all your Halloween candy in one night? Chew gum in class when your teacher wasn’t looking? In high school, did you ever write your name on a desk? Smoke cigarettes in the boy’s room? Play hooky just to get out of a quiz? What about college? Did you hang a poster of Che Guevara in your dorm room? Smoke a joint at a party? Go skinny dipping? You knew it was wrong, but it felt so right. What a rush! Your parents would never have approved of half the things you did, which is why you never told them. Now, you’re a grown-up yourself, and you understand the need to model good behavior for your own children—and grandchildren. That’s why you’ve long been a family-values Republican. Sometimes, though, you miss being a rebel: that feeling of defiance. Finally, there’s a safe and effective way to regain that feeling—with Joe Biden. Your friends and neighbors are all voting for Trump because they think the Democrats are coming to take away your guns and raise your taxes. That sounds a lot like how your parents said candy would rot your teeth. They’re voting for Trump because they say protesters are all bad people who want to burn your neighborhood down. That sounds like the “scared straight” lecture you got during health class. They say the stock market is going to crash if Joe Biden gets elected. That’s like how they said your music had hidden Satanic messages when you play it backwards. Don’t you just want to tell them to chill out? Once again, it’s time to rebel. A vote for Joe Biden is a license to sit at the cool kids’ table, wear a leather jacket, drive a hot rod. And, because it’s a secret ballot, none of those squares will ever know how you voted! Joe Biden—the rebellious choice for conservative adults.
